Pieces of Us

The Birth of Madeline and Gabriella- A Decade Ago

This is long and the first time I have ever written it all out.  As Maddy and Gabby's 10th birthday approaches I really wanted to have it all written down from the perspective I have now.  Please make sure to click the link to read the entire thing.

The Birth of Madeline and Gabriella- A Decade Ago

    As I sit to write this birth story my beautiful twin daughters sit on the precipice of adolescence. This both scares me and excites me. I have been a mom for nearly a decade.  A decade!  Looking back and reflecting on their birth prompted me to finally sit down and write it all out. It’s probably a lot different than what it would have been had I written it while they were still babies.  However, the point of view I have now may prove to make a more enriching story.
    When I was around 28 weeks pregnant my doctors told me to be ready for these babies to come any time after 30 weeks.  Mike was just returning home from being deployed on a nuclear submarine. He left a wife with a small bump of a belly and returned to a woman who might have just swallowed a beach ball by the looks of her. 30 weeks came and went, so did 32, and 34 and 36. I was blessed to have doctors who did not believe in induction before 39 weeks without a strong medical reason. From what I hear now babies are often induced at 37 or even 36 weeks for no reason other than moms discomfort.

The Birth of Jillian Clementine

I feel like I need to get this all written down while it is still very fresh in my mind. I will go into a bit of detail so if you are at all squeamish or shy about birth details you may want to skip reading it. Just thought I'd put that out there.

After a week or so of really crazy prodromal labor I really thought this baby wanted to stay in forever. I had never had a baby so active in the womb before, I could tell she was posterior most of the time meaning her head was facing front was in my pelvis and not back toward my spine. There were elbows and knees everywhere. Add to that the fact that she could turn sideways even into the 39^th week and well..it was not comfy.

I went in to see my midwife on the 27^th and really hoped that I was dilated some more. She checked me and I was a really stretchy 3cm so I was feeling really confident it couldn't be too much longer. I had prayed a lot that she would come in February and not on Leap Day. I knew that if the Lord wanted it to be then she would come that night, it was her last chance to be a Feb-non leap day baby.

I went back home and I felt really good, a few contractions but nothing bad. Around 7pm I took a bath and had about 3 contractions in the tub which was more than I had had in days. When I got out I told Mike that he should go to bed early and get some rest because I really felt like I was in labor. Our plan all along was to labor almost completely at home. I wanted to birth at home but Mike was really afraid of that so we compromised and he said we would not go to the hospital until I was ready.

I got all the kids to bed and was having contractions about 8-10 minutes apart or so. By now it was about 10pm. I was feeling so good being home , everyone asleep and just being on my own to relax through the contractions. I went in my room and put the tv on low and sat on my birthing ball just rocking for awhile. The contractions were finally starting to hurt and I had to breathe through them and hum a little. As they got stronger I thought maybe I'd try to rest in bed a little so I got in and laid on my side. I was dozing in and out and hearing the tv in the background and I realized I was having two contractions per commercial break which meant they were about 3 minutes apart.

I checked my cervix and I was at least 4cm so I decided to call my mom. I wanted to get to the hospital when I reached 6cm because I usually only get to 6cm and then dilate straight to 10cm and birth. Mom was on her way and I was still wanting Mike to get rest so I made some raspberry leaf tea and walked the hallway drinking the tea and laboring, stopping to hum through the contractions every 3 minutes on the dot.

When my mom came Mike heard the door open and got up. My mom watched me for a few minutes and then said it looked like I was almost to transition already and if I wanted to get to the hospital I should go. I knew she was right at that point because the pain was intense. I had a big contraction getting into the Jeep but thankfully had a minute or two rest in between them. We started off for the half hour drive to the hospital.

About one mile from the hospital I felt my water break. I actually giggled when it happened because I have never felt my water break spontaneously when not in the hospital. I told Mike and he laughed to and then we thought, "Oh great, that means this baby is coming out SOON!"

We arrived at the hospital and I was actually really relaxed, so far everything was going how I wanted it to go. We got there at 2am and the guard tried to make us stop and register.  Mike who is the calmest most level headed person on the planet had a slight bit of hysteria in his voice when he told them I had to get in NOW. That made me laugh too. A nurse came out with a wheelchair since I was squatting in the hallway. I told Mike to do whatever and I was fine with the nurse. She started wheeling me up and making conversation.

"So is the your first baby?"

"No, it's my sixth."

"OH!  How far apart are your contractions?"

"3 minutes"

"OH!  Then we should run!"

I was still really calm and for some reason seeing a total humor in this situation that everyone around me is kind of frantic EXCEPT me.

We got up to the labor and delivery unit where I was turned over to the best nurse EVER.

She should be a midwife honestly. There were no rooms for me available so she took me aside and checked me in triage. I was at 6cm, just where I had wanted to be. At that time I started to shake and I told her that I was going into transition so they should hurry and get me in a room.

She wheeled me into the room they were readying and the maid was still rummaging around. The nurse Jamie told the maid to get out which made me laugh again. At that point Mike was back with me, Jamie helped me out of the wheelchair and then she said the best thing I think a nurse could say.

She winked at me and said, "Do your thing mama" and then she left. She left us alone, no meddling, poking or prodding. It was just Mike and I in the quiet. My contractions were very very intense and I should have known we were minutes away at that point but I didn't because all I could think about was how the baby was posterior and needed to turn.

I leaned over the edge of the bed and gave Mike orders to push hard on my lower back while I rocked my hips back and forth, back and forth. I told him I needed to vocalize during this because it was intense and not to let me try and stifle it. He did SO good encouraging me even if I did tell him to shut up please once. 

I remember at this point telling Mike I needed to pray.  I was feeling like I couldn't do it anymore.  So I prayed right there leaning over the bed that the baby would come quick and I wouldn't have to endure much more. Well God answers prayer let me tell you!

This is when the story gets really crazy like a tv movie. And also where we meet our villain who will be referred to as 'the evil dr". As I was swaying my hips I suddenly felt the baby turn. It was like that thunk you feel when you turn a deadbolt and the lock sets. As soon as I felt that, I felt the baby crown! I yelled at Mike, "I have to push NOW!" He shoved me on the bed and ran for the nurse.

He kind of paused at the door and I yelled, "NOW, the head is coming out NOW!"

I could feel the babies head ans was kind of still squatting on the bed. Jamie came in and said, "sit back!" firmly but not forcefully or mean. Enter the EVIL Dr. I do not know if she was not very experienced or what but she was panicked. I was still not that panicky, I just knew there was no time left. Evil Dr began shouting at me. "STOP PUSHING> STOP IT RIGHT NOW!"

I told her matter of fatly that I couldn't. Any Dr. should know that once the head has crowned you really aren't pushing anymore. My body was pushing but I was not telling it to bear down.

Evil Dr. continues to yell. "STOP PUSHING!"

Jamie whispers in my ear, "Don't worry, babies come out with little help from us, you;re fine."

I told Evil Dr.  "The head is coming, I can't stop."

Evil Dr said the worst thing EVER. "Well, fine then, your baby will just fall out on the floor then."

That made me so mad, Jamie whispered again, "It's ok, don't apologize to her just do what you need to do."

And so to spite the Dr, I let the baby come. (OK, not really, baby was just coming anyway.)

The Dr said an expletive that I won't type but I am sad that that is the first thing the baby heard. Evil Dr was so panicked abut not having a glove on. I'd hate to see her in and emergency situation out in the world! Sometimes you just have to go with the flow and not follow procedure!

The cord was wrapped around the baby's neck (this is not all that uncommon though). I was not surprised because with all her flipping in the womb I knew it would be. It was around twice and so Evil Dr had her fingers in between the cord and the baby's neck and she is STILL whining about gloves. Finally she got her act together to disentangle the baby and the baby slid out.  This all happened in about 2-3 minutes time from the time the Evil Dr. entered the room.

She laid the baby on me, checked the placenta when it came out and then literally left. I tried to apologize (ugh, I hate that I apologized!) and she turned and said, "Well, you made it really hard because I had no gloves." and she left. I never saw her again and I hope I never do or I will have things to say.

Jamie (the nurse) told me I did everything right and then she said, "I wish she (the Dr.) hadn't even come in, we'd have done just fine on our own." Then we made jokes about why the Evil Dr was so mean. I think Mike was in shock that she had treated me like that. He was kind of speechless.

So at this point we had not checked for the sex of the baby and I told Mike to go ahead and look. He looked surprised that I wanted him to be first. He looked and told me, "it's a girl!"  I was so shocked because I had really thought it would be a boy.

So that is how our little Jillian came into the world only 28 minutes from the time we pulled into the hospital parking lot. She weighed in at 6lbs 6 oz. So tiny for being overdue! She also had a really teeny cord, Fully developed but really small. She is doing great though, nursing well and is so calm. We came home 14 hours after she was born and Mike has been waiting on me and serving me meals in bed, doing laundry, taking care of kids like a dream husband. What am I saying he IS a dream husband!

The kids are all in love with her especially Ginny and Caleb. Caleb's first words were "Hold her? MINE!" and he just sits by her and grins. She looks just like Ginny so that makes her so happy too.

Welcome Little One

OK, to tell the whole story ( and I am sure you want all the gory details)  I  should start at the very beginning.

On Monday I went into my doctors office at 2:30 pm. My midwife stripped my membranes and I was at 2cm. She scheduled my induction for Wednesday at 7am but said "I think I might see you tonight!"
Mike and I left and went to the mall for awhile to walk around and then out to a big dinner.
On the way home I started having contractions. None were painful but they were somewhat strong. I thought maybe that it was from the internal exam and might settle down. When I got home I lost my mucous plug but still was not sure if that meant it would be that night. I chatted online with Sandi who kept telling me over and over that I was in labor. LOL
Around 6pm I got in bed and started timing but the contractions that were coming 5 minutes apart stalled. At 11pm Mike came to bed and I told him I was going to try and get some sleep but we would likely go in later.
I slept til Midnight but then I wa so uncomfortable I got up to time the contractions some more. They were pretty steady at 8 minutes apart so I woke Mike up and told him we needed to go in. As I went to the bathroom before we left I lost a ton more of the mucous plug.
We called Mike's parents and they came over to stay with the little ones and I called my mom and sis and put them on stand by.
Mike and I left for the hospital and got there at 1:30 am.
They made me wait in the waiting room because they were trying to ready a room for me, the labor ward was PACKED.
Finally I got a room and the nurse went to check me. Her fingers were too short so she had to find a long fingered nurse. Lovely.
The long-fingered nurse announced I was at 4cm. (woo-hoo) We could be admitted. She had me get comfy and then she hooked me up to check my contractions. They were 2.5 minutes apart NOT 8 minutes! Mike and I walked the halls for an hour to try and move things along. At 4am she checked me again and I was still at 4cm and my contractions had stalled. The nurse called my midwife who wanted my OB doc (who was on call) to break my water and get things going again.
We called my mom and she, my sis and Gabby came to the hospital.  Maddy chose to stay behind.
The nurse inserted my IV but blew my first vein and had to do another. Then my doc came and broke my water, I was STILL at 4cm.
At 6 am my wonderful, amazing midwife showed up and checked me, I was STILL at 4cm, I told her I had been at 4 a lONG time and she asked if she could start pitocin. I said YES! Anything to get things moving along. Having my water broken did speed up contractions and it also made them hurt more. The sweetest nurse ever brought me a rocking chair and labored most of the rest of my labor in that. I had decided early on I was not going to ask for an epidural this time. I knew if I could get to 6cm without it, the rest would go very quickly and I was certain I could tough it out. I wanted to experience labor and delivery in a different way. Most of the other times I had had babies, I felt no pain and it was like I had not even gone through the process. I wanted to feel everything. Maybe that is wacky but it just suddenly became very important to me. I HATE pain, I am bad with pain but I was determined not to mention stubborn.
So, once I got the Pitocin things moved quickly, I was really breathing through contractions and they were very painful but tolerable.
Anne (my midwife) checked me again and I was at 6 cm. She felt like it would go really fast now. I moved to side lying on the bed and then the contractions got really bad, bad enough that i sobbed through all of them. Mike tried rubbing my back but it was the nurse who really applied some good counter-pressure and made me feel better.
Gabby was a little nervous at this point, especially since I had announced that I was dying. (LOL, really I was dying!) I felt pressure and told Anne to check again and I was at 10cm. NOw I was really crying, knowing that it was the end BUT that now I had to push this bowling ball out and I was not even sure where my legs were located.
Anne stopped and went over to sit with Gabby and talk her through what would happen next, although Gabby looked worried she did not cry. (Gabby was so funny because she was obsessed with those paincharts on the wall, the ones that have smilie/frowny faces to measure your pain. Every time I had a contraction she would say "Mommy looks like the green face now" or whatever color I looked like. Finally when I started crying she said, "Mommy is at the blue face now because there is tears.")
I think that it was hard on my mom, sister and Mike too, to see me in such pain, they were used to my happy smiling epidural labors.
Anne told Mike to grab one of my legs and the nurse had the other the pain was so bad I could not even think, I just wanted him out!
I managed to find it in me to push but I know I yelled at least once and mentioned again to anyone interested that I was dying.
When Caleb crowned I begged her to get him out. She told me "Don't be scared just put your chin down and push." Finally his head was out and man did it still hurt. I looked over at Gabby and she was grinning like a fool looking at his head. So that gave me the strength to push out his shoulders and then he slipped out at 9:53am.
Now one thing I never realized is that it still hurts after the baby is out when you have not had an epi. LOL I am not sure why I did not realize this. She put Caleb on my belly and he looked SO tiny. Gabby came over to see her new brother and she was still grinning.
I nursed him right away and he took to it from the beginning.
Caleb weighed 7 lbs 1oz and was 19.5 inches long. His head is perfectly round and gorgeous. He has brown hair (yippee).
The night he was born 11 women were in labor which is insane for this hospital. I was moved upstairs to overflow and had a nice big room. Then at 8pm they brought in a bed and started to get it ready to room someone in with me. I started sobbing, I did not wnt to share this time! I did not want to have to walk past someone to the bathroom. UGH.
They brought in a young mom who had her first baby.  The room was just not big enough for two people.  She had about 12 family
members crowd in to their corner and they were SO loud and obnoxious. Then she asked if her husband could sleep in there!! UH NO WAY am I sharing a room with her husband too!! The nurse thankfully said no and that she would......try adn find her another room! YAY!!!!!!
So I got my room back to myslef. Praise God!! Caleb and I enjoyed the rest of the stay, we had wonderful nurses and it was by far the best delivery experience I have had. Maybe because I did something I thought I could not do. I never thought I could make it through a natural delivery but I am so glad I did. Would I ever so it again....heck no! But now I know what it feels like. LOL
Childbirth actually hurts!  Who knew?